Category Archives: music

Work, Music, Sushi=Life?

My problem with blogging is that I think too much. I need to just go at it. It’d make me do it more, and it wouldn’t feel like work. Speaking of, thanks to my boss I got to see Jay-Z and Mary J. Blige from the 10th row, at the perfect angle to the stage, this past Monday. “Which car is more hip hop? The BMW or the Lexus SUV?” When his wife rolled up in the Lexus to pick us up from the dive bar close to work he informed her, “We’re gonna take your car. Brittany said it’s more hip hop.” He then went on to give his wife props for “lookin’ all hip hop.” She did too, in her black knee-high boots. With my printed hoodie I was going for the street hip hop look, no stilettos for me.

When we were downing our double drinks, I learned a lot about where things are headed with work. It’s pretty huge so I’m definitely hanging on to this job. The most exciting thing is that in a week from tomorrow we’ll get our regular pay, plus the extra at the end of each month (which I’m hoping should be pretty hefty, I mean I’d settle for just a $100 and it’s already going to be way more than that). Some purchases I’d like to make (okay, I should use some towards credit card debt): A FULL BED for a REAL WOMAN! (A real “ladycat” deserves nothing less, afterall, and I’ve been without a real bed for too long), a new digital camera, and some new clothes/shoes, because I’ve been in the same ol’ duds (more or less) since who knows when.

Pants just visited and it was a good time, but I spent way too much money. I realized how much I talk about my boss, and this means two things. One, work is life, especially when you can work from wherever, whenever. Two, I’ve already got a lot of good stories from partying with him, hearing things through the grapevine, and just dealing with him. It’s entertaining stuff, because it’s a unique kind of work environment, and I feel really lucky for it. I don’t know many other people in their office “career” job who can relate as much. It goes for every job, but you just don’t know what it’s really like unless you actually work there. Of course there are times when I feel like I’m fucking everything up or he’s being way too demanding or ADD, but overall, the good outweighs the bad (and the perks help too- monthly full body massages with a top-notch masseuse, free concerts and albums for my reviews, a Trader Joe’s-stocked kitchen).

Another thing on my mind lately is music; I never buy it anymore. I think this is why my taste in music is feeling so outdated. I have old favorites, cd’s accumulated when Mom was actually paying for it. They nearly make me sick to look at now. I want new, new, new. No looking back! I need soundtracks to launch me into the future!!! Up, up and away. I do have new (or new to me) favorite bands/artists, but I just don’t have their albums:

Hot Chip

Bonnie ‘Prince’ Billy



Sly & The Family Stone

Nick Drake

Rolling Stones

Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings



St. Vincent

Vampire Weekend (I feel like such an indie-scenester toolbag cuz of them, so I might start hating them soon, if they start becoming even more overhyped)

Dengue Fever

So yeah, I guess that extra bread will, in part, end up going towards some hefty music purchases.

I’m waiting for A to come over. I think he’s finally taking me OUT to dinner. We never go out, the closest we come to that is when he rides his bike down to the sushi place and brings back a feast for us (bean curds, mmm), which I think is so sweet. I can picture myself a year ago imagining my boyfriend and saying, “He should be the type who will go ride his bike in the rain to get me sushi!” It’s a tiny detail of a “requirement” I would come up, because I love sushi and boys on bikes. Tonight though…sushi out could be extra nice.


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Filed under food and diet, music, work

The Joys of Life with Man-Influence

I haven’t blogged in a month and a half. Work, moving to Oakland, and having a man in my life suddenly, have all kept me plenty busy. As my bedroom hardly constitutes a hang out-able room, the ratio of nights I’ve spent in my new bedroom, to the nights I’ve spent at his place, are probably neck and neck. Here’s a taste of what we get up to.

Last weekend

Friday: Skipped the Oakland Art Murmur. Skipped the German avant-garde band in the city. We took the Keepin’ It Clean van just down to the Stork Club. Great, divey atmosphere. Sat and smoked out back before the live act took the stage. It was an “ironic” white kid, who covered “Poison” by Bel Biv Devoe, and otherwise, rapped about cell phones with a T-Pain effect. Stayed for his performance, danced a little and went home. Partied like rock stars. A party of two, but damn, was it crunk. Snapped photos like we’re fabulous celebrities (which we secretly are).

Saturday: Still high. Showered with Irish Spring. He poured his Rock Star into a red cup. From a basketball court, we listened to some Africans play music on the playground. Sunny stroll down Telegraph. Toured the student co-op he used to live in. I swung in the hammock on the roof. Blondie’s Pizza. Joints on the couch. Elephant beer. 6 pm and it was bedtime.

Sunday: 14 hours of sleep. Eventually, I helped clean the house by washing the dishes and suggesting the 409 orange-scented cleaner, over the generic window cleaner.

Wednesday night (?)

A list of our night’s keywords that turned into a poem:

1.) Safety pins and cigarettes

2.) Rap music and Charlie’s hiccup breath

3.) Orange helicopter with beatdown sleaze

4.) The dollar in my pocket brought a million to their knees.

Other keywords/themes with us include:

1.) NPR on the “Ian” radio

2.) News at 10

3.) “love note” IM’s

4.) Andre champagne, and the promise of champagne with a real cork someday

5.) the drawer of despair

6.) listening to The Zombies

7.) me getting paid lots of attention and loving it (who doesn’t!?)

So for those very few who have been wondering what I’ve been up to, that is what my life has been lately, regardless of whether it’s a weeknight or weekend. I can’t complain, for now.

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Filed under dating, drunk, emotions, music, sleep

Shit You Should Be up on, II

Hot track: Wu Tang Clan’s new single“The Heart Gently Weeps”, featuring Erykah Badu, John Frusciante, and Dhani Harrison. In related news, RZA won the Hip Hop Chess Federation Benefit Chess Tournament! Congrats, RZA!

‘Ight track: I’d been waiting for “the remix of Alicia Keys’ “No One,”” since not long after I decided I’m feelin’ it. It had to be someone, might as well be Cassidy. His album “B.A.R.S.: The Barry Adrian Reese Story” is said to be droppin’ on Nov. 6th.

Old news?: Who knows when it came out (somewhat recently it seems), but fuckit, Lil Wayne’s got a new mixtape out. “The Drought is Over, Pt. 4.” I am in the middle of downloading it, but you know I’ll be praising it within the next week.

Video: Cassidy and Swizz Beatz “My Drink N My 2 Step.” It’s refreshing to see simplified dance moves, instead of people wilin’ out all over the damn video (talkin to you, Soulja Boy). Sometimes I’m fond of Cassidy, other times I can do without him, but when he’s gettin’ his drink and his two step on, I ain’t about to hate! Keep dancin’, boo!

Lastly: Just for giggles, I want to remind you all, Kid Rock got arrested at Waffle House!

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J-A-(ladies help me say it now)-Y-Z

Who’s excited?!! I’m gettin’ there. It’s like, “UGGHH, Son! UGGH!” (haha, Scary Movie 2)

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Posted on a Stoop in the Hood

One look at the neon signs in the same store front window, reading “BRAIDS,” and “FISH BURGER SPECIAL,” and I knew I was in the hood. Another block of storefronts with still more braiding salons, and questionable eateries, and it occurred to me that these are the kinds of places that the hood needs. Just the bare necessities without anything fancy about them. It’s straight-forward, no frills.

I had made the mistake of telling Cedric I was hungry, so when his friends pulled up to a bunk philly cheese steak place I had to claim that I was fine. There was no way I was going to consume anything from that place. Chris, the hyperactive, funny man, asked, “I thought you were hungry. What is this, some sort of miracle or something?” Laughing, he bounced outta the car and went into the store to fulfill his munchies craving.

When Cedric picked me up, with “Hood Nigga,” blaring, I had a feeling we were just going to a house. We went to his friend’s house in Hayward, on the border of East Oakland. “No, it’s West Oakland that’s really, really bad. You don’t want to go there,” Cedric clarified, after I said I’d heard bad things about East Oakland. Well, too bad I’ve already been there. “You scared of the hood?” I smiled because I was nervous, not about the hood, but about what he thought he was going to get out of me. Though I’ve never been to the “hood-hood,” I’m still too hood-literate to not know what you’re trying to do when you bring me to your boy’s house. True, I’ve made some bad decisions in the past, but I don’t get down like that. I’m not the average hoodrat that you’re probably used to. At the time, I wasn’t annoyed by Cedric; it’s the end of the evening that left me feeling frustrated about everything.

In all honesty, I was relishing in the fact that I was in the hood, sitting on a stoop with three Cameroonians, toking a blunt, while the car in the driveway blared Lil Wayne, Jeezy, T.I., and Gucci Mane. I stood out even more because of the interview clothes I was wearing, having just come from North Berkeley. Across the street people were doing the same thing, except with flasks of Remy in hand, and their music was coming from inside the house. Inside the house I sat on the stoop of, there wasn’t much. It was getting re-furnished. Only Cedric’s friend with the name I can’t pronounce lives there. Cedric told me they are moving into this house, but later I heard his nameless friend on the phone asking, “How long is this house off the market?”

Once his friends came back with the Swishers and we smoked, Chris started staring at the sky. “There’s something out there, girl. Look. Keep looking. There’s something more, you know what I’m saying? See the bat?” He was right. I could see clouds shaped like bats, flying into the evening sun. I thought of Mr. Paul and how he gets spiritual with me too. Maybe it’s because they come from such unfortunate backgrounds that they’re convinced to believe in something higher, to get them through this life, I thought to myself, high as the moon (Chris’ saying).

“Wanna kill this blunt?” Cedric put me in charge of unrolling it. That was a bad idea, and only after I unrolled it to a shitty, ragged-edged piece of paper, did I realize, “I’ve never unrolled a Swisher before. I’m used to Backwoods.” I’m constantly talking about Backwoods with anyone I smoke blunts with. I can’t help myself. We all had a good laugh over that, then Chris said he could still use it to roll with. He broke it in half so we smoked a mini blunt. When I passed him the roach he suddenly held it with a piece of tall grass that he picked from the yard. He had it pinched around the blunt like a makeshift roach clip. That wasn’t his only trick.

Before we even smoked I had given him a cigarette. He took it to his mouth and bit around the edge of the filter. With one whack against his leg, the filter came out. “What are you doing?” I asked. He peeled off the outside of the filter, then stuck it into the cigarette backwards. “That’s where the nicotine is. Here, try it.” I smoked it, not noticing much of a difference besides that the filter was very squishable. Once we were on the 2nd blunt he started to do the same thing to another cigarette. He started to explain how he learned it from watching the old men outside the cafes in Cameroon. When he got tired of talking he said, “Now, let’s take a break, like BET!”

Cedric fed me all this bullshit. It didn’t help that we were in his friend’s bedroom. “I wanna roll with you, girl, for real. How you feel about me? Cuz for real, you’re like the full package.” Ah, yes, nothing says “I wanna fuck you,” more than “You’re the full package.” He needs to calm his shit. Hanging out at a club once means you still don’t know me, and if you think you do, you’re wrong. Leading me into bedrooms isn’t going to work either: 1.) Oh, you think you’re that smooth or something and that I can’t wait to jump on you? Nuh uh! 2.) Way to make me feel cheap and uncomfortable. Part of me thinks it’s my Asian face. I refuse to make your Asian porn fantasy come true. Cedric’s last offense was repeatedly asking me when he can see me again. What does he want? An Excel spreadsheet of my social plans for the coming year? On top of that, he claimed I’m hard to get a hold of when he’s only called me twice. He was being really needy by the end of the evening, especially for a Virgo.

And so, my new guy requirement is that we’ve got to be on the same intellectual playing field, if we want to get anything accomplished. I should’ve realized this a long time ago, but until recently I was searching for something completely outside of myself. Looking at the hills from the front stoop, I was high. I was wondering how I get myself into these situations and why. I concluded that I must be scared to get close to anyone. Am I really one of those people?, I wondered. I’ve never been close to anyone, but I’m wondering if there’s something in my subconscious that won’t let me get close to anyone. Why else would I end up seeing guys that are from a different world than me, guys that will never figure me out? I might be too defensive, or I know that they’re not worth it from the get-go. I’ve never wanted to meet a nice, white boy more than right now.


Filed under blunts, dating, emotions, herb, hood-related, men, music

2007 MTV Video Music Awards…ugh!


BRITNEY, BRITNEY, BRITNEY! Have you ever seen anything so awful from a once-promising performer? I’ve never been a fan – the misspelling of the name we unfortunately share is enough to make me an enemy for life – so for a “return” performance to insult a non-fan to such a degree, well, speaks volumes about how heinous it all was. With her frizzy hair extensions, and an ill-fitting sequined bikini, Britney was anything but sparkling. It’s clear how much she hates herself, her life, and her fame, which is only keeping people interested because she’s such a complete train wreck. It’s entertaining, but if you look at the big picture and see her as a real person, the actuality of it is sad.

As for the other performances, Chris Brown stole it. I have never been to Vegas, but if I ever go, there ought to be black men dancing and jumping on tables! Big ups to Breezy! Alicia Keys is the real deal. When she came on it was obvious that she’s different from the majority of the MTV favorites, in that she is an actual, talented MUSICIAN and PERFORMER, and that is refreshing to see. The other real performers are the Foo Fighters, who are the only current rock band that matter, and jamming with Cee-Lo further proved how down they are. Then, there was Lil Wayne who showed up twice during the evening’s un-spectacle of an evening. During the pre-show he filled in for T.I. on Nicole Pussycat Doll‘s single and rapped, “Her name be Nicole, oh man, she fine/ Standin’ there lookin’ like a glass of time/ You should make it hours, yours and mine/ I can’t pronounce her last name so it should be mine!” Later, he performed alongside Fallout Boy (where did they get those fun masks? Cuz I want one). He delivered lines like, “Flat like a tummy. Atkins Diet, I don’t know I never tried it.” I liked him in the blue button up. Stylin’, Weezy, stylin’! A lot of the show was just an ad for Kanye West‘s “Graduation,” and if I wasn’t already planning on buying 50 Cent‘s “Curtis” tomorrow, then I would be inclined to now, if only because I’m sick of Mr. West’s face. Justin Timberlake performed in another suite with Timbaland. He won points for saying, “I want to challenge MTV to play more videos!” Then, there was the Kid Rock and Tommy Lee fight, which sadly, was not televised. Typical rich, white trash fighting over some blonde bimbo (actually, I like Pam). Lastly, how about Dr. Dre? Has he been working out with 50? Dre is jacked and looking better than ever!

Overall, the 2007 MTV Video Music Awards were a chaos-fest. There was so much going on all at once, everywhere. That’s smart of MTV, I suppose, since that’s how teenagers’ minds work now, with the influence of technology making them more and more “A.D.D.” Why was it necessary to have bands performing on the mini-stage setup in the main auditorium, only to cut to commercial midway through? Same for the multiple floors of performances, all of which were too damn dark anyway. Though I love me some mainstream music (rap), the mainstream music industry sucks and so does MTV.

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Best of…Videos featuring Lil Wayne

By now, we all know that Weezy F. Baby is a star (“I’m a crazy ass star like a fuckin’ asterisk [sic]”). Some of these songs wouldn’t be doing too much without him (ahem, Lloyd). Others are just an all-star cast of players (“Make it Rain”). Why did I really choose these videos? I’m still a teenybopper when it comes to my love for Lil Wayne. Every move and hilarious face he makes is GOLD! When Weezy’s on screen I turn into a stupid baby (not to be confused with Baby/Birdman), drooling at the mouth, and giggling with amusement at every funny face Weezy can come up with. I wonder when this obsession will end. Probably not anytime soon, since Lil Wayne’s “The Carter III” is dropping next year and he’s gonna RUN ’08!!! Like a fucking marathon runner!

Currency ft. Lil Wayne & Remy Ma -Lil Wayne’s dances in this are something I haven’t seen from him before. That shoulder move? Who taught him that?

Ja Rule ft. Lil Wayne

Birdman ft. Lil Wayne

Lloyd ft. Lil Wayne

David Banner ft. Lil Wayne, Akon, and Snoop

Fat Joe ft. Lil Wayne, T.I., Rick Ross, and some other guy

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