Just less than a week, and I will be a woman with some cash money!! I’ve never had this much money at once. And it may not be this much extra next time around, as the boss has determined some goals were way too easy to achieve. Still, he seemed impressed with us today. I am pretty psyched for this. That money better be in my hand on the 1st, just for the feeling of walking out with my paycheck plus this amont. Dolla, dolla billz, y’all. Forgot in my last post to say that I also plan on putting some money towards a (used) bicycle and its necessary accessories. Sometimes you need to be able to fly around town quicker than any bus.
A’s interviewing a rapper, so who knows when he’ll be around tonight. (one minute later and I get an update: He called me to say the interview went really well. I think I’m loving this phone convenience, even if he’s got a “hooker phone”). Typical PMS has made me go and order a pizza. I think I should buy a scale, or maybe I should wait until I’ve had a bike to ride around for a while.
Whenever I’m home alone I’m so antsy; I never used to feel so antsy. It’s hard for me to settle in comfortably when it’s early/mid-evening hours. I make up excuses in my head about why I can’t do laundry (lots to do, so lazy, no quarters,…cramps) and instead sit in the living room smoking a bowl, like “an adult” (semi-boring), listening to The Gossip’s Live in Liverpool. For a minute I had Jeopardy! on but then the antenna connection gave out.
What I’m really sitting here doing is thinking. Thinking about the conflict(s) in my life. I don’t want them there. Why do I feel like I have to choose one thing over another? Am I losing myself somewhere? What does distance really mean? I have no idea what direction anything will go in. I need to know. There needs to be assurance! So while I take a step forward with some, I’m simultaneously taking one step (at least) back with another. What’s a girl to do?
Read my horoscope and listen to MGMT, I guess…”Weekend Wars” is such a Stones rip-off song, but that doesn’t make it any less enjoyable. “Electric Feel” is the sexy, electro-disco-pop song of the summer! One worth working up a sweat to. 
